Skip to main content

Fangirl Goals and World Domination Plans - Onicia Update - January 2018

Lead Image 2018

Welcome to 2018! Thanks for faithfully reading my Onicia Updates and for encouraging me on this journey towards world domination. Wait. What? Oh, yeah. I grew up on Spice Girls, girl power, and all the Disney princesses; ruling the world was always the end goal.

Now that you're up to speed, I'd like to reveal my plans for 2018. This year, I would like to collaborate more. There's an African proverb that says “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” I want to go far! To do that, I'm kindly asking you to show me all the funny, inspirational, dedicated, unique, community-minded people. Whether for entertainment, education, or professional connections, I just want to meet more interesting people.

This month, I have a few shows coming up, The Stoop is back, and I wrote some cool articles last month. Also, I added a new feature to my newsletter. Check out these 10 things I'm fangirlin' for.

So, will you help me go far and achieve world domination*? That's all I gotta say today. Got something I should see or someone I should collaborate with? Email me or shout at me on Twitter.

*If I can't become ruler of the world, I'll settle for eating ice cream on Fridays. That's a goal worth striving for.

Upcoming Events

Am I Man Enough: I Jumped Off The Cliff (Volumes Bookcafe)
Storytelling
January 10, 2018

The Stoop: You Got Me F*cked Up (Rosa's Lounge)
It's The Stoop's 5-year anniversary!
January 25, 2018

The Kates (Book Cellar)
Stand-up Comedy
January 27, 2018


Published Writings

As a person with chronically cystic or lumpy tissue, Bev Spangler was no stranger to mammograms. Once Bev’s friends learned of her cancerous lump, they came together to plan a Creativity Curing Cancer event.

In this installment of Just Being Funny, I lie to myself about a breakfast ritual that caused me to rip 8 pairs of pants in one year. *covers face in shame*



click to tweet


Heaux, Heaux, Heaux! Holiday TV Movies For You (Heauxs Magazine)
Nothing fuels the bad movie machine more than the holidays! We've got 8 brand new holiday films we're (hate) watching and you should be too—

RAEKA Beauty is Changing the Beauty Industry (HuffPost)
Holistic healing systems have been widely accepted in India for centuries. RAEKA Beauty, which features the world’s first and only turmeric peel-off facial mask, is on a mission to change the American beauty industry.

JBF: Take it Like A Woman (The Daily Herald)

Listen, Rebecca! I'm just a teenage girl with a hundred-dollar monthly allowance. I ain't giving you all my coins. Just dump this here creamy crack on my head and let me rinse it out AT HOME.



Onicia Update - December 2017
Onicia Updates - November 2017
Want to join my club of consensual stalkers? Subscribe!
Created on St. Maarten. Based in Chicago. Onicia Muller (@OniciaMuller) writes, says funny things, and enjoys hanging with creative minds. 
Support the arts by buying me ice cream or telling your Twitter homies.

Popular posts from this blog

Alive, Making Stuff, and Ready to Collaborate - Onicia Updates - December 2018

This month's newsletter is inspired by my friend and fellow creative living in Chicago, Erisa Apantaku (@erisa_apantaku) . Erisa produces content for some of my fave Chicago media organizations including City Bureau and South Side Weekly. As we break for the holiday season and prepare our resolutions for 2019, I want you to know that I'm alive, making stuff, and ready to collaborate. Holla at me or connect me with anyone interested in producing a play (especially in the Caribbean), publishing short fiction or personal essays, producing video or audio content. Next year, I want to be all about sharing stories. I don't plan on doing as many live storytelling or comedy events, but I'm open to creating stuff for the internet. Know any business owners needing a website upgrade, blog content, newsletters, or press releases? Here's a link to my portfolio and list of services. Well, that's all I gotta say for 2018. See you in the new year and hopefully we...

Joanne the Scammer and the Unpaid Intern - Just Being Funny

Cold sweats, shakes, delusions, and diarrhea. I'd surpassed the “I'm so sick I should see a doctor regardless of the copay” phase and was now in the “here's my computer password; call my mom if I die” phase. I’d lost seven pounds through running to the bathroom to clear my colon. On day fourteen of what I was sure was a modern strain of the Black Death (Dramatic. I know!) when my internship boss called.  Apparently, she thought my two weeks’ notice was contingent on me finding a replacement. It wasn’t. After eight months of unpaid laboring, I decided to move on. Finding a replacement was my parting gift. It wasn’t my fault, nor my problem, that Rebecca the unreliable Canadian was, well, unreliable. Short of breath and borderline delirious, I explained that even if I wanted to, I couldn’t help because I was seriously unwell. Faster than it took me to put my arms under the covers and roll on my side, my roommate’s phone rang.  Mumbling. Chucking. Pacing. There’s a kno...

Everyone in Hollywood is Blowing 'Big Smoke' - Women in Film

Miriam Glaser  as Leah. 'Big Smoke' is written and created by Laura E. Bray and Miriam Glaser. Big Smoke is basically what my life would have been had things not worked out for me and Le Roommate.  About four episodes into this 6-part comedic web series about selling a TV show, I realized that Big Smoke is basically what my life will be once I work up the courage to actually sell my scripts. Here’s what Big Smoke creators  Laura E. Bray  and Miriam Glaser taught me about selling a television script. You can’t sell a screenplay if you don’t shop your screenplay. There are plenty of people looking to buy, so shoot your shot . Despite what LinkedIn profiles, IMDB pages, or company websites say, everyone is just blowing smoke and hoping for the planets to align . So, yes, go to that pitch meeting with a positive attitude. Don’t sweat it if things fall through. Don’t cyber-stalk your ex or creative competition -- especially not ...